It's A Little Early for This I Know...

Top 10 Music Releases of 2008 (in my opinion, of course)
10. Cheap Girls - Find Me A Drink Home (quote/unquote)
Great record. Reminds me of the Smoking Popes and that's a good thing.

9. Polar Bear Club - Sometimes Things Just Disappear (Red Leader)
They're awesome and deserve the attention they've been getting lately. Had the privilege of seeing them 1 1/2 times this year and they put on a great show and sound awesome live.

8. Senses Fail - Life Is Not A Waiting Room(Vagrant)
Yeah I know my some of my friends give me shit for liking this band, but they write very complex songs and Jason Black from HWM is their new bass player. So I guess my friends should just eat a dick.

7. Reverse The Curse - Paths EP (self-released)
These dudes are 18 and 19 and fucking blow away musicians 10-15 years their senior. These 5 songs have been in my rotation since I got this in my possession. Can't wait to hear their full-length.

6. Get Bent (self-released) - Demo
I know another demo but what these guys do on five tracks with a somewhat shitty recording is more than some bands do in 12 songs on a polished disc. Watch for these guys to make a lot of noise next year.

5. Dead To Me - Little Brother EP (Fat Wreck Chords)
This band rules! Pumped for the full-length.


4.The Hold Steady - Stay Positive (Vargrant)
This record is amazing! I've been rocking this since it came out and can't get enough.


3. The Gaslight Anthem - The '59 Sound (Side-One Dummy)
This band is starting to get some criticism from the punk community due to their recent critical acclaim. The thing is they kinda came out of nowhere and released 2 great albums and an solid EP within 2 years. A good band is a good band and Gaslight does it well.

2. Lemuria - Get Better (Asian Man)
I'm totally in love with this band and this record. If I'm in a good mood or in a bad mood and want to be in a good mood I put Lemuria on.

1. Dillinger Four - C I V I L W A R (Fat Wreck Chords)
The four year wait since their last record was painful, especially with rumors that it was coming then wasn't, then was then nope. I think it was well worth the wait, because this album is fucking rad.

Biggest disappointments:
Bayside - Shudder (Victory)
It's not a BAD record, but I expected a lot more from them.

Tom Gabel - Heart Burns (Sire)
Not horrible, but I didn't like the over-produced aspects of this record. Then again, it's on Sire and New Wave was pretty hard to stomach, but still the shitty drum machine and vocal effects killed this. I will mention that I caught him on tour about a month ago and these songs sound WAY better live than tracked.

Most anticipated for 2009:
The Lawrence Arms
A Wilhelm Scream
Dead To Me
The Loved Ones

If I was a rapper my rymes would go something like this...

Damn girl
I like the way yo ass look in dem jeans
'Minds me uh cookies 'n cream
Cream... I'd do it all ova ya chest
Let yo doggy lick it off uh you
While I'm smokin da best
I'm always pimpin' in muh '99 Honda Civic
I fucked every hoe at the Senior Olympics
Yeah I like 'em gold, silver and bronze
Cause they always let me drive their big shiny cars
Some say da blacker the berry the sweeter the juice
I say the older the granny the looser the cooch
Don't even try to front like you don't want this
I can't help myself when I look at dem tits
Girl you silly playin hard ta get
I know you been droppin panties since 1936
I'll eat that snatch so don't even sass
Let's make a film uh me slammin that ass
Throw it up on tha hub
Tha whole world gon show me love
Baby anal with you is SO legit
Fuck all that prune juice I'll make you shit
Come on ova this player'll make it all good
Shit, I tear through depends like a termite through wood
Don't even front like you aint gon come back for mo' fuckin'
You know I'm a freak and you guh at suckin'
Yo teef fallin out was tha best christmas gift
So get on yo knees before you're dead stiff
I'll hit it good cause I aint no dummy
When you dead don't forget to leave me dat money

...or something like that

shameless self-absorpsion

I'm very interested in music (finding new, keeping up with favorites, etc.). In this day and age, the best way to do that is myspace.com. Most bands don't even have websites anymore because it costs money to build and maintain them so why not use (or abuse) a free networking site? Well that's fine, but what irritates me is that bands will make an elaborate layout with 20 ways to buy their music and merch scattered amongst youtube videos of them, 'want us to play your town?' banners and pictures of their prepubesent fan base showing their "love" for them. When I see this it makes me not want to look at their myspace page, much less listen to thier music. I understand it is hard to "make it" in this industry anymore but the ones who are taking these desperate and shameless measures are showing that their intentions are merely to make money off of their music which isn't even art anymore. It's more of a business and that just doesn't sit well with me. I understand you're trying to reach your target audience consisting of 12-16 year olds whos parents are coughing up the dough for concert tickets, lunch boxes and wrist bands. Well here's an idea... write good music and play good shows with other good bands. You will get recognized. If you're really an artist you will be acknowledged eventually for your creativity and originality instead of "whoring" yourself out. To me that's what it is, sorry, but how much of a career does a hot prostitute really have? You start out blowing some old dudes then you take the one-on-ones and are making a decent living, then move on to anal, then threesomes and are living the life. 5 years later youre a heroin addict begging to suck someone off for $10. That's the career these bands are setting themselves up for. Maybe five years of "getting laid and paid" followed by a major narcotic addiction and nobody wanting you.

Give a dog a bone.

Today is Wednesday and I'm in a pretty good mood. And good moods make me wanna talk about things I like. So here's my top 10 (in no particular order).
1.) The fall - There's pretty much no better time of the year in Ohio. It's not too hot, not too cold. Most shows worth seeing come during the fall. You can hang outside before being cooped up in the house all winter long. Finally, they start selling Christmas Ale in November.
2.) Breasts - They've always fascinated me since I was a child, and they never run out of variety.
3.) Cheap alcohol - It serves the same purpose as expensive alcohol, and after a few drinks you don't notice the difference. I hate it when someone is "too good" for a certain beverage. You may only refuse if you know you will vomit profusely because there hasn't been recuperation time since the last time you decided to binge drink the aforementioned substance.
4.) Swenson's - Best fast food, hands down.
5.) Friends - Always good for a laugh weather its at your expense or theirs.
6.) Toddlers - Ah, what a great stage to be a human. They are at the age where all conversations can be made humorous and don't know enough to argue with you. If kids stayed that age forever I might consider having more.
7.) Girl fights - They crack me up, it's kind of like watching a retard fight...I mean "handicapped person" fight (sorry) but there's just a better chance you will see way more girl fights and won't feel as bad for laughing.
8.) Finding a new band - There's just something special about the feeling I get when I hear a band for the first time that sounds like nothing I've heard before and makes me want to cum in my pants.
9.) youtube - I could be entertained for hours on end!
10.) Free stuff - come on who doesn't? Unless it's an std or a black eye or a roofied drink, it's free so why not enjoy? Free songs, free food, free furniture, free sex (without stds), and free cars are all things to make anyone a happy camper amirite?

I jack off to good times!